Monday, May 7, 2012

The Show Must Go On

I might be back from time to time to share my musings. Two and a half years later. I'm no longer a stay at home dad. Haven't been for a long time. But I might use this space from time to time to share my thoughts about the world. My little girls have grown a lot in the past two+ years!

Friday, October 30, 2009

Return of the Son of Nothing





EDIT: Really annoying. The carriage return on the edit page is much longer than the space on the display page. I had to go back and edit my not-as-genius-as-I-thought-it-was perioding-instead-of-spacing so that my margins would work. Hmmm. Hyphens instead of periods instead of spaces might be the way to go. Genius, Part II.


So, daughters for.about.six.waking hours.a.week.these.days. Absence.does make.the.heart.grow fonder. Especially.for.them. It's.a.mob.scene.whenever.I.come.home. Instead.of pitchforks.and.torches,.though,.I.get.hugs.and.giggles.'m.a.sucker for.positive


I.have.another.problem...I.don' Finding usable.material.for.keeping rule.#1.( difficult.

But.heregoes: Had.a.little.mission.reunion with.some.guys who.I.was.with in.the.Bela.Missao.Sao.Paulo.Interlagos. Cesar Melo, Gavin Young, Josh Burke, and me. Gavin's wife, Jodi, took the picture.

These.three.guys.were.all.mission.legends. Terra and Jeremy Daniel, also mission legends, were there, too. They had to leave before picture time.


Just a reminder. If you figure out rule #2 to my posts, you win a prize. Probably in the form of some free product from my fabulous wife.

Oh, and honey? I'm deleting all the links to other people's blogs on the side. Is that okay? I'll wait for your approval.

Saturday, January 10, 2009

The Binge will have to wait

I'm not biding my time on purpose, but I got busy today. The Binge will have to wait until tomorrow.

Friday, January 9, 2009

Tonight: making sandwiches, Tomorrow: BINGE BLOG!!!!

First, I'm breaking a rule with this post. There is no photo involved. That's against the rules.

Second, I've been busy breaking in the "Lounge Wear" that Carina gave me for Christmas. It looks like pajamas. It feels like pajamas. But the label said "lounge wear." Do you know how hard it is to get to blogging when there's lounge wear involved? I think it's broken in now. And I will get back to blogging.

Third, I've been teased a few times over the years about being a "kept man." That's life when you marry way above yourself and your wife is more ambitious than the two other most ambitious people you've ever met--combined. She's working on a big project for My Mind's Eye (it's a scrapbooking company) at 11:20 at night. And I'm lounging. She asked me to make her a sandwich and some chicken noodle soup. And will I do it? YES!! Why? Because I rule! And because it's less boring than playing Facebook Pokemon.



Meh. Why not?

I couldn't stand to break the rule. As long as my neurons are conspiring to direct my thoughts away from divorce and competitive sports, I might as well not break the rules. And with that line I've just set down my other rule. But I'm not telling you what it is. A prize to the person who figures it out.

The blue plaid on the left of the photo is the lounge wear. That was Christmas morning. The girls were having fun with their loot while their Aunt SuiKim (Carina's sister) took some photos. And I discovered that no one bothered to take a good picture of me. So, you don't get the lounge wear in full effect. Yet.

So, people, the wait is over. Tomorrow will be a binge blog. And I'll get back to this more regularly. Lounging/parenting/sleeping/playing video games/lawyering-once-in-a-blue-moon is time consuming!

Sunday, December 21, 2008

The old fort rises again

Saturday was fort day. Since Cousin Jack messed with Siri's fort on Friday morning, Siri wanted a re-do. We have a couch in the basement that is a hand-me-down from my mom. It's actually a great couch that was probably top of the line in the 70s or 80s when my Great Aunt Amy bought it. It doesn't compare to the couch we had as a kid though, from a fort-building perspective.

That old couch was an awful brown. The fabric was heavily textured. It was an old-school sectional with lots of pillows. We would build the walls around the sides with the seat cushions and then make a roof out of the back cushions. There were so many back cushions that you could make a huge dome at the corner of the sectional where the two wings right-angled away from each other.

It's hard to recreate that with my girls considering the limited pillow resources. But we had our fun. No Cousin Jack around to wreck the place. And I discovered that if I built a door at one side then Fliss would use it rather than wreck the fort by plowing through a wall.

Here's the fort. Not too spectacular. Fliss is demonstrating her use of the door. Of course, I'm a jaded adult. Jaded by the puny size of this fort compared to my big body. And jaded by the imaginings of that fort I had when I was a kid. I swear the dome was as big as our living room is now. But the real beauty of a couch fort can only be beheld from the kids' perspective.

I asked Siri to take this picture of Fliss from the inside. She's VERY content!

And here Siri is, happy as a little hobbit in her hole.

What would fort pictures be without a demonstration? As you can see, one SaHD's head is almost as big as the whole door. Did I say almost? How did my head get so big?

For all of you thinking that I was way too good a dad for building and playing with the fort, think again. I had a pile of laundry almost as tall as Siri to do. This doesn't seem like a lot. But I had only done it three days before that. I think my kids get clean clothes too often. I'm going to have to add "make my kids wear their pajamas for a week straight" to my list of labor-saving devices. Of course, since my wife has accused me of letting my girls wear their pajamas all day on my header that she so lovingly designed for me, that would mean that my girls would wear their pajamas and only their pajamas for a week straight (talk about labor saving devices!). I wonder if that's how Charles Schultz got the idea for the Pig Pen character. . . .

Saturday, December 20, 2008

It's winter falling . . .

Last night we went to a Christmas party at a neighbor's house. It was a good occasion to reflect on how much I love love love the weather here in Utah. So far it's been more snow and less cold than Minnesota. I'll take the mid-20s and lots of light, fluffy snow over zero degrees and icy snow every day. Minnesota is so cold in the winter that if you walk through the snow, leaving a trail of footprints behind you, the footprints will look exactly the same three weeks later. Old Man Winter leaves them there with Parnassian clarity. It was coming down pretty hard last night on the way to the party. My wife captured it perfectly in this picture:

Hmmm. I still look like a scrub. And it was 6:30 pm. And I was on my way to the home of a lawyer. And there were lots of other lawyers there. And I'm a lawyer who doesn't have a job. And I want a job. Apologies to Left Eye, but someone needs to remind me to take TLC to heart when I leave the house. The girls sure were sweet though.

Siri's Christmas program

Yesterday afternoon was Siri's Christmas program. It's definitely a "take the afternoon off from doing legal work" kind of an occasion. Carina and I both went with Fliss to watch Siri.

Her preschool is great, by the way. It's run by a woman in our neighborhood named Wendy Sorensen. She has a couple of openings for next "semester." If you live around Foothill Village and are looking to put your child in a great preschool, let MormonMisterMom hook you up.

So, they sang and chanted and marched like little kids excited for Christmas. My favorite part of the program was also a "bad dad" moment that turned out great. They sang a little song where each of the nine kids got to say something that there was going to be a lot of at Christmas time. A kid would say "Presents!" and then the class would sing something along the lines of "There will be lots of presents, lots of presents, lots of presents at Christmas time."

I was filming the program with our five year old video camera. I also have a plugged up left ear that I need to get cleaned. One of the kids had her turn right as I was looking down at the camera. I looked up to see if it was Siri who had spoken, but missed it and wasn't sure. The song ended and every kid had had a turn--except for Siri. Miss Wendy asked if they all had a turn. I wasn't sure so I kept quiet. I blame the plugged up ear and not wanting to be too conspicuous as a SaHD. Luckily, one of the other moms (who also sends her daughter to our house for regular playdates when Carina is home) was on top of things and let Miss Wendy know that Siri hadn't had a turn. So she asked Siri to pick something that there would be lots of at Christmas time. Lots of pressure on Siri here because eight things had already been picked. Reindeer, presents, angels, Santa Clauses, lights, candy, and a couple of other things. It was one of those moments when, as a parent, you're like, "Oh, man. I hope my child doesn't totally fail." Such a moment is especially mortifying as a stay-at-home dad (I think I just created the acronym SaHD for that--too much to type over and over). The reason being that if your child fails, it's even more your fault than it would be if you're a mom. Your child will quickly be labeled as "that kid with the stay-at-home dad." Moms do such a great job at prepping their kids for thinks like Primary programs and little performances. A SaHD has a lot to live up to without the natural instincts for this type of prepping to fall back on. In fact, I think all the time that teenage girls spend in front of the mirror primping (if they're all anything like my sister Liz) gives them the special ability to sense when their child is properly prepped for something coming up. Dads don't have that sense. And I'm rambling. The point is, if you're a SaHD and your kid fails at something like this, the other moms will NEVER let their kid come to your house for a playdate. "That dad didn't prep his daughter for the Christmas program. One can only imagine the kinds of things that go on at that house!" One program gaff and I'd be back to square one with earning the trust of moms.

So there's Siri, all eyes on her, outside of the flow of the regular song, expected to say something relevant to Christmas. She paused for about ten seconds, ummmming and ummming and ummming. She looked around to see if someone was going to help her. She ummmed one more time and said, almost as a question, "Wed noses? (yes, Siri can't say her "R"s yet--it's kind of cute if you know the code)" The room erupted in laughter. Not the expected answer. But there's no denying that Rudolph has a red nose and that Santa has a red nose and that we all have red noses when we spend too much time in the cold. Relevant and a little clever. She's a cute kid that way. She usually gets the big laugh in performances. I was proud. Later, I heard one of the other moms say, "She's such a character," in a loving way. My kid is the character of the bunch. Do characters with SaHDs get playdates? Only time will tell.

Here are some pictures of the event for your enjoyment (or at least for the enjoyment of my wife).

Siri's class. They're a good group of kids.

Fliss had a great time, too.

Siri with Santa. She couldn't remember what she wanted for Christmas. Carina reminded her of the My Little Pony amusement park she's in to. After having her memory jogged, Siri would not stop giving Santa all the details. She went on and on and on. Santa was a good sport. I think it was in the midst of this that one of the moms promoted her to "character" status.

Fliss wasn't as in to Santa.

And here I am with my girls. Someone needs to remind me not to look like a total scrub when I leave the house. I know that moms are used to getting done up before they leave. I don't have that habit as a SaHD. I make a point of looking professional if I'm going to do some legal work after I leave the house. But it doesn't occur to me that I should look presentable at a preschool Christmas program. Yet.